Platinum Confidence or Shiny Objects
- Holly McIlwain
- Apr 16
- 3 min read
What’s the difference between showing up with platinum confidence — weighty, precious, dense, and strong — and reacting to the attraction to shiny objects and opportunities?
Knowledge. Ready to discover the keys to your own platinum confidence?

The Narrow Spaces Between Work and Life
We often talk about work-life balance like it’s a clean split: work over here, life over there. But the truth is, most of life happens in the narrow spaces in between—the undefined zones where roles blur, expectations are unclear, and the good stuff can get squeezed out if we’re not careful.
When those narrow spaces go unexamined, we risk missing out on what matters most. But when we define them—really define them—we can start to live with more alignment, integrity, and purpose.
Knowing It All (Or At Least, What Really Matters)
It starts with values.
Can you name your values? Can you claim them? Can you aim them?
Naming your values is a great start—but it’s not the finish line. Words have power, yes. But clear expectations fuel action. It’s not enough to say you value “integrity” or “connection” or “creativity.” What do those words look like in real life? What do they sound like in conversation, feel like in your body, or show up as in your choices?
If your value is “presence,” does that mean putting your phone away at dinner? Taking real lunch breaks? Pausing before you say yes to another meeting? Define it. Live it. Let your values become verbs.
Talent Is Not a Free Pass
Here’s the truth: everybody has talent, but talent is not universal. Your unique strengths—those beautiful, natural gifts—are meant to be applied, not just admired.
I know I’m good at loving people. It’s one of my deepest talents. But even love has its context. There are places where my loving nature needs to be guarded, protected, or more thoughtfully expressed—for my own well-being. That’s not a flaw; it’s wisdom.
What about your talent? Where does it flourish? And where does it need better boundaries or clearer application?

Platinum Confidence
Too often, we let our confidence get shaped by outside forces—paychecks, praise, performance reviews. But that kind of confidence? It's aluminum foil: shiny, light, and easy to crumple.
When you know what values anchor you and what talents propel you, your confidence becomes something else entirely. Something solid. Durable. Something like platinum.
You don’t throw away platinum. You protect it. You build with it. You remember it’s worth something—even when nobody else notices.
Just a little reminder next time you’re wrapping up leftovers: ask yourself, am I holding onto something disposable, or something that will last?
Pain Into Purpose
Discomfort is inevitable—but it doesn’t have to be meaningless.
The question isn’t why did this happen to me? The question is what can I learn from this? That shift in perspective can turn pain into purpose.
I’ve learned this lesson in deep, personal ways. During my cancer journey, I came face-to-face with the reality that sometimes, when I refuse to let my heart break open, life finds another way. If I won’t surrender, sometimes my body is the one that breaks.
That’s a hard truth. One I’d rather not relearn. So now, I try to listen earlier, soften faster, and lean into discomfort with curiosity rather than resistance.
You don’t have to like the pain. But you can still let it teach you.
So, What Does “Having It All” Really Mean?
Maybe it’s not about having everything—but about having the right things. Things that match your values, amplify your talents, and bring purpose to even the hard moments.
Maybe “having it all” isn’t about balance, but about alignment.
Maybe it’s not about squeezing more into the narrow spaces—but widening them. Giving yourself breathing room. Permission. Grace.
Because life doesn’t wait at the edge of work. It’s happening right here, in the in-between. Don’t miss it.

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